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You’re my best friend and I’m worried about you, I haven’t seen you in forever and you’re being mean as hell right now.’ I held my hands up in surrender. ‘Forgive me for being concerned, but I’m not the enemy so you can stop attacking me now.’ Her stance softened as she ran her fingers through the shag she was growing out. ‘Shit. I’m sorry. I’m…we’re going through a rough patch, that’s all.’ I must have looked as disbelieving as I felt because she grabbed my hand gently. ‘Seriously. I’m fine, okay? Now tell me what we’re doing today, because I feel like getting something tattooed. Or pierced.’ I scratched at my chin, temporarily letting her change the subject. ‘Shane wants me to buy something slutty, but I don’t know. Every time I buy lingerie he rips it off so it seems like a waste of money.’ Sydney put her arm around my shoulders with a sly look and steered us out of the store. ‘Rips it off, you say? Then I have the perfect thing for you to get, Big Red’s gonna love it.’ *** I. .. I'm terribly sorry Jessica, but your mother just isn't in the mood right now to talk to you. I guess she's too embarrassed about her predicament.Bull shit, she isn't even there. And who the hell is Nip-Nip?That's your mommy's pet name when she's here with us, on account of her two long... ummmm... !You really are a freak aren't you?If you think I am, you should just see your mother!You fucking liar. You've never even spoken to my mom.Oh I had a very nice, long conversation with her only three weeks ago. It was very enlightening I can assure you.What crap are you talking about now?I called her exactly three weeks ago, much the same way I'm calling you now. She was very concerned about the things I had to say about you.About me? What things about me?Well for one, that you had been spending an awful lot of time with us.I still don't even know who you are.Nip-Nip was very shocked to hear about all the different uses we had found for that long tongue of yours. It downright scared.
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